I am having a hard time finding time to give to others. I’m trying my best to be relatable again-to not just be a “widow” but to carry the former spirit of Brenda with me in this new life journey. However, finding time, and the strength, to deal with others in their struggles, has become a huge burden for me.
I want to be there for my friends-I want to offer up opinion, advice, and most of all, a lending ear. But it’s hard to not feel even more burdened with the everyday issues I face while trying to carry theirs as well.
It makes me feel like a horrible friend. Wanting and trying to be a good friend, but afterwards feeling drained of all my resources and energy, and feeling worse because of not only my sufferings, but theirs as well.
It feels impossible to be able to rediscover myself, work hard, study hard, find family time, commit to my friends….the balancing act is NOT an easy one.