Grateful

Speaking to a friend about this..I just wanted to share my thoughts with you all on this process I am going through.

I want you all to know how truly grateful I feel to have the life I have, and especially, to have the life I did. I was given something absolutely amazing, that few people find in their lifetime: their true soulmate. I was given the chance to love and be loved further beyond what I could ever have dreamed in any fairytale. When I met Kevin, I honestly felt like it was a dream. I didn’t believe that such a handsome, strong, loving man could love a chubby short girl like he did. I was always waiting for the floor to drop out from under me.

But he showed me what true love was like, and how pure and ecstatic it could be. He gave me the chance to feel emotions I never felt before, and to express them. And in the past 4 months, he showed me a strength, a will, and a love that I never saw before, in anyone.

He gave me a new life. And now, he gave me another new life. As much as I don’t want this gift, I would give anything to have it back, it’s something I have to accept and receive. With love. And I do. I grieve him unbelievably, but I know that there is a reason I have a new life ahead of me. I want to make the most of that, and I never want to take this for granted.

I am blessed.

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Brenda Sieglitz

Brenda Lee Sieglitz is an author and public speaker whose topics focus on travel, grief, and nature. Widowed in 2008 at 24 years of age, Brenda is an advocate for sarcoma patients, the widowed community, and conservation through her volunteerism with the National Park Service, Lancaster County Conservancy, Pennsylvania Master Naturalist, Hospice of Lancaster County, Soaring Spirits International, Angiosarcoma Awareness and Highmark Caring Place. Brenda won the 2009 Associated Content “Content of the Year” award, and in 2011 was named one of Wyndham Women’s “Women on their Way”. Most recently her love and loss memoir, Ebb from the Shoreline, won 1st Place Editor’s Choice in Nonfiction at the 2014 North American Book Awards. Sieglitz holds a degree in business and became a Pennsylvania Master Naturalist in 2015. In her spare time, she adores playing with her two nieces, going on family adventures with her husband, stepdaughter and son-in-law, hiking, camping and is working to complete her bucket list dream of visiting all National Park units. Sieglitz has been married to her best friend Dave since 2013 and continues to reside in Lancaster County with their two beagles Scotch and Fina.

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Comments 2

  1. Mandie November 14, 2008

    Bren,
    What a process, huh??!! Your entries, including this one, manage to put a lump in my throat every time I read them, and I feel compelled to check in with your blog on a daily basis. I am drawn to them. You are an Amazing person, as everyone is telling you. I just happen to think as I am reading your latest entry, what both a gift and a curse you must feel every day has been. I read your struggles through this unimaginable process. You are such an “open” thinker. Making the most of each day, your new life, and not taking it for granted is definitely a full time job (with overtime!), especially the times of the day that feel more like a curse than a gift.
    You are truly in my thoughts and prayers,
    Mandie

  2. Nan November 14, 2008

    You have a perspective on life that many people never gain in a lifetime, Brenda. I am thankful that you are finding some peaceful moments and hours as you move forward. Your blog will be an important part of my daily life for as long as you continue to share your journey with all of us who love you. Let me know when you’re up for a Saturday breakfast at the Willow Street Diner!

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