I want to write about Camp Widow and the tips I have and the experiences I had and the relationships I made. But sometimes something more powerful overshadows all the wants. Sometimes you read someone’s news and your heart shatters with theirs.
What I read on the Facebook status of a widowed friend today broke my heart into a million pieces. It goes beyond what my mind can comprehend, beyond ways I have learned to heal. These things transcend what my body is able to handle. This is where my faith steps in.
The last time my faith kicked up this much was when Kevin was sick. It kicked in to help me believe that something greater than I could HANDLE this. That I could trust in that something to get me through, to settle these emotions, to heal. Now, that’s all I can rely on. The situation is out of my hands, out of her hands, in something greater than all of us.
Part of me is sad that only faith could get me through this, but it really is all I have to rely on. It’s all I can trust in because I can do nothing, I am powerless in everything. Not just big situations, but powerless in all situations.
But faith does give me power; it gives me the power to believe that maybe He can heal them, maybe He can provide a lifetime that’s more than a few years. In my heart, I hope this is true. For them, for their mother, for their future and also for what was taken in the past to give them this knowledge.