I haven’t blogged much, but it’s because not a whole lot has been going on-THANK GOODNESS! I had a pretty nice week. Got to hang out with my friends and family a bit, which is always nice.
Today we celebrated my cousin Angie, and her upcoming baby boy with a shower in Etown. It was nice, and good to see the family again. I feel like I’ve seen the Harnishes every weekend for a while now with all that’s been happening.
I began purchasing my hockey equipment, and in the midst of trying on my hockey gloves, lost my “widow” ring. It was a black stone ring that I had purchased to wear instead of my wedding rings a few months after Kevin passed.
When I first realized it was gone, I almost had an anxiety attack. My heart skipped and beat and my hand felt SO naked. Then i thought about it. What are the odds that I lost my widow ring IN a pair of hockey gloves while trying them on? Very rare….I’m taking it as a sign from Kevin to get on with it. It was just bazaaro.
I’m doing ok….feeling DEFINITELY more empowered, more able to stand on my feet and move forward. Stepping out of my comfort zone to start to purchase the hockey equipment, and just making plans is really helping me. I’m starting to dream more freely and think about what I want out of this life.
I’m actually getting excited about life again. I missed the exhiliration of looking forward to things. I still miss you babe..but I’m glad I’m being set free each and every day from the HUGE knockover waves of depression. The waves are still lapping…….but I’ve been able to stand up for a bit now and it feels great!