There are just no words. Not from me, not from those around me. How can you put THIS into words? The only thing I can say, is that we are surviving.
I continue to just be devastated. Some things I can talk about with ease, and others just cause me to break down. I want to cry all the time, but I know I don’t feel any better. I want to ask why, but I know I will get no answers. I just want to not be. But that also is not an answer. It is just so hard.
Losing a part of you is just torrential. There is such a HUGE emptiness that no one can describe. It literally feels like I have been ripped apart and as ravaged as Kevin’s body was with this cancer. I hate it.
Thank God for my support system pulling me along. Thank God the arrangements are made so I can just focus on being with my family and trying to get through the day.
….there are just no words sometimes.