Letting Go Versus Committing

At a writer’s group on Wednesday, I was discussing the things I wanted to give up and change in my life. I told them about the struggles I was having in my career life, the hopes I wanted for my future now having completed my degree, and the exciting opportunities that I have ahead. I was nearly in tears sharing these things with the group, and one of my friends, Sara of The Covered Wagon, encouraged me to view these changes as committing to the things I enjoy.

I have been looking at all the changes in my life as having to “let go” of things. Letting go, signaling that by giving up something, I will lose more than I will gain. In my brain, this is my fear. What if I make a big career change, will I hate the new setting? Will it bring me joy and stability? Will I be able to complete the tasks at hand? Will it be worth “letting go”?

Several weeks ago I made a priority list and gave up (there I am saying it again!) some things that I enjoyed. I passed on some projects I had started, and I placed on hold some activities that I was looking forward to completing this year. I realized that I could not say yes to everything, or else everything would be lacking.

By “giving up” things, I gain a lot. I can put forward greater effort into the things that are most important to me at this point in my life. Many doors have opened in the past several weeks in the areas of cancer support, and travel writing. I have been handed opportunities, received many congratulations, yet still I feel like I am the one who is still losing.

I want to feel as if I am gaining by committing to the things that are not only the best for myself, but will give the greatest reward to those around me. Maybe part of this loss feeling, is that I feel I am being selfish is receiving these opportunities. I am the one who is reaping the rewards right now, but those who I want to receive the gains, have yet to see them. I want that to change.

One foot in front of the other, I’m going to keep reaching forward to completing the tasks I have in front me, but with a vengeance, with a zest to have a great return on investment.

Brenda Sieglitz

Brenda Lee Sieglitz is an author and public speaker whose topics focus on travel, grief, and nature. Widowed in 2008 at 24 years of age, Brenda is an advocate for sarcoma patients, the widowed community, and conservation through her volunteerism with the National Park Service, Lancaster County Conservancy, Pennsylvania Master Naturalist, Hospice of Lancaster County, Soaring Spirits International, Angiosarcoma Awareness and Highmark Caring Place. Brenda won the 2009 Associated Content “Content of the Year” award, and in 2011 was named one of Wyndham Women’s “Women on their Way”. Most recently her love and loss memoir, Ebb from the Shoreline, won 1st Place Editor’s Choice in Nonfiction at the 2014 North American Book Awards. Sieglitz holds a degree in business and became a Pennsylvania Master Naturalist in 2015. In her spare time, she adores playing with her two nieces, going on family adventures with her husband, stepdaughter and son-in-law, hiking, camping and is working to complete her bucket list dream of visiting all National Park units. Sieglitz has been married to her best friend Dave since 2013 and continues to reside in Lancaster County with their two beagles Scotch and Fina.

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