What is THIS?

Beware: Ranting, Raving, No sense thought process ahead!

Since this is like my bedside diary, this means that often my blogs are a big jumbled mess of thoughts-so that’s why the title is vague. Lots o’ stuff running through my head.

What happens to love when it’s done? Just because the person is gone doesn’t mean the love is lost. It’s still very much there-with no one to PUT THE LOVE ON. I think that’s why those of us who have loved and lost quickly fill our lives with temporary things to ease the hurt, the loss the pain.

That’s why people turn to sex, drinking, gambling, smoking-all types of addictions that they hope to ease the time until their unrequited love is rediscovered. The trouble is, for some of us, many of us who have loved and lost, that love doesn’t get passed on. It diminishes, it never passes. It’s on hold and keeps a section of our hearts forever.

Yes, things come about that re-create love-I do believe love is found again-I’ve seen it happen. However, I do believe there is forever a part of your heart and soul that carries that person for the rest of your time on this earth. Never forgotten.

That’s just one thought.

Why do people take advantage? I guess it’s human nature, but seriously? Why do people feel that they can hurt the ones they love the most? How do they feel they can get away with that and just walk away? Why??

Just things I see around me-love destroying one another. It can’t be love can it? It’s so jumbled and messy and destructive. It sounds cliche to say the devil is in the details, but I do believe evil exists and it’s messing up a lot of good things.

How do we combat it?

that’s another thought….

I’ve started talking to God again. I can’t say it’s really a prayer-more of a conversation. Just sitting down to breakfast yesterday. Not at the point where I’m ready to ask for forgiveness for my sins as I once prayed. More of-you know what I need, and I don’t know that I’ll ever understand what was done, but I want to communicate again, to not feel so sheltered or alone.

I guess conversation with God is a good way to start.

next thought..
Tonight I go to my first Mary Kay event in over a year. Some of these women I have not seen since before Kevin got sick. I’m kind of nervous…….

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