Life is Messy

I wondered when I titled this blog if I had already written a “life is messy” blog.  Amazingly, no, but that didn’t mean I didn’t already mention it.  I’ve always known that life wasn’t always so clean, but I never knew it was so messy until probably my early 20’s.  Now that I’m in my late 20’s I KNOW it’s messy.  I have confirmation!

Garfield's the Perfect Example of a Messy Life (plus, I have an affinity to this particular cat)

People keep re-iterating in my dumb numb leg journey (that’s what I’m titling it, but it ain’t nothing like Janet’s leg journey) that if it ain’t one thing it’s another.  Yes, I do realize that typing this out reiterates how very Lancaster County we all are around these here parts.  Despite our slang, it’s true!  When Kevin died that was the BIG THING.  Then my Grandmpa died, then my Mom got cancer, then my Grandma died, then my Dad got cancer AGAIN.  I kept thinking holy moly this is nuts.  How can one person be hit with so very many bad things?  Why?  Because LIFE IS MESSY.  It is!

It’s cruel, punishing, evil, destructive.  But it’s also inspiring, enlightening, adventurous and surprising.  No one ever promised me that my dreams would come true, I just always hoped/thought that they would.  Some did, some did not.  Some came true in a much different way than I ever expected.  Some came true and then faded far too quickly (I had hoped they’d last a lifetime).  But I was given no promises from life on earth.  None.  Even today, no promises.

I used to beg/plead that life’s surprises would end and that life would stop being so darned messy and give me some peace.  Now I try to find the fun moments in between the messy.  The good stuff at the bottom of the barrel that can fulfill me through the gross parts.  I have pain/numbness and frustrations right now.  But I also have relaxation.   I have lounge time.  I get to chill with no reason not to!  These are good things, necessary things.

Life is going to keep being messy, but I’m gonna find the joy in that too.

Brenda Sieglitz

Brenda Lee Sieglitz is an author and public speaker whose topics focus on travel, grief, and nature. Widowed in 2008 at 24 years of age, Brenda is an advocate for sarcoma patients, the widowed community, and conservation through her volunteerism with the National Park Service, Lancaster County Conservancy, Pennsylvania Master Naturalist, Hospice of Lancaster County, Soaring Spirits International, Angiosarcoma Awareness and Highmark Caring Place. Brenda won the 2009 Associated Content “Content of the Year” award, and in 2011 was named one of Wyndham Women’s “Women on their Way”. Most recently her love and loss memoir, Ebb from the Shoreline, won 1st Place Editor’s Choice in Nonfiction at the 2014 North American Book Awards. Sieglitz holds a degree in business and became a Pennsylvania Master Naturalist in 2015. In her spare time, she adores playing with her two nieces, going on family adventures with her husband, stepdaughter and son-in-law, hiking, camping and is working to complete her bucket list dream of visiting all National Park units. Sieglitz has been married to her best friend Dave since 2013 and continues to reside in Lancaster County with their two beagles Scotch and Fina.

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Comments 3

  1. Wendy July 28, 2011

    I love this post, Brenda! I truly believe that optimism saved my life and even made it worth living again after I was widowed. The way I see it, things happen in life and all we can control is how we react and how much we let it ruin us. Here’s to the good moments and some good painkillers! 😉 Seriously, though — I wish you well on your dumb numb leg journey. I hope this gets resolved or at least managed quickly.

  2. Brenda July 28, 2011

    That’s awesome Wendy, it IS worth living again! Thanks so much.

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