The lake was still frozen, but I was sunshiney, alive.
My leg is numb but the rest of me is ready to roll.
Why can’t it all connect?
Today I found out I *may* have a pinched nerve. It *may* also lead to surgery. I DO have to go to Physical Therapy. I DO have to restrict myself from lifting, sitting too long, walking too much, doing ANYTHING too much. If I don’t listen to this numb leg of mine, I could have many bigger problems ahead.
I am kicking myself. Self pity of course. Why didn’t I slow down before now, why couldn’t I have taken better care of my health, why did this happen to me, will I feel my leg again? Of course, it’s only been 24 hours of numbness. Some people go their entire lives with a symptom such as this. My body has always functioned-maybe not perfectly, but I could get by. This though, this is different. I can’t feel parts of my body. That’s freaky scary.
I can only do the work now that I should have done before. I can only take care of myself, give myself grace, stop and slow down. I can only do what I can do and the rest is up to you know who.
The lake thawed eventually, and I still have sunshiney moments. Maybe the two will connect soon again in my life.
wow, thinking of you hun. If theres anything i can do, im here for you. xox
Sorry to hear about your numb leg.
If needed to learn, kick yourself … but then stop. Feeling guilty is rarely beneficial motivation. You don’t have the past … you have today and from this day forward … what can you do to make today a good day for you and your body?
Unless it’s extreme, I’d hate to see you have surgery for a pinched nerve … our bodies are amazing and can heal from a lot if given the proper care. Physical therapy is key! It has a big part to play in how well I am doing post-accident. Do the therapy. Do it! Do everything they tell you to. Listen to your body as you do the exercises … you know your body better than they do. So if it aggravates your pain do that exercise gently or modify the exercise … otherwise, do all the therapy and do it well.
Sometimes when doing therapy, it’s hard to diagnose the pain we feel … it is better, worse or somewhere in the middle? And is it actual pain or is it an excuse our mind wants to grab a hold of to ‘allow’ and justify quitting. (Not that I would ever do that. Ha!) So that’s when you need to pause, breathe deep and be aware of your body and be honest with yourself.
Happy recovery!
Thanks Janet, I start PT tomorrow. I’m stretching at home and doing light exercises so that I don’t “lock up”. It’s getting to me. I’m anxious to start PT and get healing!
Thanks, I may need some help soon 🙂