Recapturing the Essence of my Blogs

Tonight I tried to describe this blog in brief: it’s about grief and travel.  “The grief of traveling?”  Well, not quite, but there’s another topic to explore.  As I moved away from and this blog my thought was to focus more on all of the topics I enjoy sharing with you: loss, cancer fundraising, road trips, local Lancaster fun.  Every day, or every few weeks (as I see it’s been a while since I’ve shared with all of you), I find less and less to share about my grief journey and more to share about my life journey.

My grief is mostly kept in the closet now, and only oozes out with significant dates, and experiential reminders.  I don’t describe myself as a widow who now has a boyfriend, I just have a boyfriend (not just).  Life is going on without having that grief clause built into it.  The things missing from my life more revolve around lack of motivation after I leave work, time to travel long distances, and my struggle with questioning and finding Faith.

So even with the blog having been redesigned to cover these stories, I am brought back to it’s original purpose: to focus on life, leisure and local.  What a great reminder for my all around mission: live life to it’s fullest, experience leisure with the ones I love, and support my local community.

How do you describe your day to day journey?  Are you living or looking in the past?


I would love for you to guest post on your idea of life, leisure or local.  Leave a comment if you’re interested.

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Comments 10

  1. Hi Brenda!
    I wanted you to know that I have chosen you for The Very Inspiring Blogger Award. You can see the details about your nomination on my blog post:
    Much love! -Erin

  2. This is wonderful, Brenda! It’s a good feeling to start to see yourself as someone who lives this life and has been widowed, instead of a widow who is building a life. As time passes, the “widow” part recedes more into the background of our lives. It won’t ever go away — the past cannot be changed — but it becomes less central to every aspect of our being. It has been wonderful reading about your journeys — in life and in widowhood — and sort of progressing along with you. Here’s to the “life blog”!


  3. Yes to life! I am trying to move away from the grief thing in my blog too. It is on reason why a long time ago I changed my tagline to “My Journey Through Widowhood and Beyond”. But, as you know, I still post about stuff related to grief in addition to other stuff.

  4. Thank you so much Erin!

  5. Thank you Wendy, and cheers to the “life blog” as well. I like what you said about my widowhood not being central to my being – that’s exactly it!

  6. I like reading about your life besides widowhood to learn more about you. I can only hope the others feel the same about my non-grief related writing.

  7. Brenda,

    Today I decided to type in a google search on widows without children and got your wonderful blog. I have chosen life, but it is indeed an altered life. Year 2 started for me in May and I am grieving more these days about not the lost opportunity to have children with the love of my life.

    I live with Multiple Sclerosis and when my husband passed away (which was sudden) it was two weeks before my appointment to get clearance to start our family. I spent two months weaning off medication so that we could have children.

    I decided that it would probably would be beneficial to amp up my “mommy” moments through my godchildren so this week I went to the open house for my goddaughter who is in kindergarten. While I enjoyed myself and she was excited to show me everything, when I got home; I spent the night in tears.

    I am glad to have happened upon your blog and will be reading prior posts as I continue to try and find a “new normal” in my life.

  8. I’m so glad you were able to reach out and find us here – it’s so difficult to see those moments in our friend’s and families’ lives and to be happy for them. One day at a time and thank you for reaching out.

  9. Rebuilding a life is the best way to see it, however hard it is to see it that way.

  10. Thank you Erin!!

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