Just Be

I should have become an anthropologist.

I love people – being involved with them, interacting with them, watching their mannerisms, and of course, judging them.

A friend said to me tonight that she wasn’t worried about cleaning before I came over because I wouldn’t judge her.  She was mostly right.

Where does my judgy-ness come from?  Is it just part of my DNA, or was it taught to me growing up?  Is it from the people I surround myself with?  It’s not a very good characteristic.

I want to be more apart, judge wise, from people – interacting with them without feeling the need to change or fix or give advice, but just to be with them.  That was something I craved deeply after Kevin died.  For someone to stop talking to me and someone to just be with me.  To be quite honest, it’s still something I crave.

But it’s nothing something I’m particularly good at.  I want to share MY side, what my influence is on the subject, how I can help, what should be fixed.  But that’s probably not what people want to hear.  I was doing *so* well at it for a while, but then I slipped back into new habits.

How do you just be with someone else without overbearing someone else?  I think it’s time I figured that out.  I guess I don’t need an anthropology degree for that after all.  I just need to do it.

Related posts

Comments 4

  1. It’s funny the perceptions you have of yourself and what others see when they interact with you. If agree with your friend. You’re one of few I would that I would allow into my house when it’s in complete disorder because while you think you may be judging, I know that behind that judging is an empathetic woman that I deeply admire and respect. As for “just being”, I think you’re doing a great job of that, too.

  2. I am so judgmental and I have to give me advice/opinion even when I haven’t been asked for it. Fortunately my friends accept it and just laugh at me and say, “tell us how you really feel about that Sandy!”. So, when you figure it out let me know.

  3. Totally sounds like you lol

  4. Awwwww I love you too 🙂 And respect and admire you!

Leave A Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.